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hmm.. alot has happened.

been busy with my 90 yr old great grandmother's funeral.

About her: she's really cute. Abit short and smaller in size. Whenever she holds my hand, i'll play with her skin haha. Cos it's very fascinating- smooth and.. stretchable? when i tell my sis she'll "tsk" me to don't pull. She stays with my uncle. After we know she's ill, we went to visit her quite a few times. She could still walk. Then the next time we visit her, she's on the bed, getting up only when eating. i attended to her awhile once, after she finished the porridge and grill fish, she'll ask for water to drink. then she takes out her ..denchers? (fake teeth) and rinse her mouth. haha with nothing inside the mouth, her cheeks flabs up and down while goggling the water- very de cute! After meal, her skinny body will lie back to bed and sleep.. erm, she speaks teochew so most of the time i'm not very sure what she's saying. But i know simple2 ones. She kept saying 'tia', which means 'pain'. ..There's nothing we could do.
When we went to visit her in hospi, she's very skinny already. Our relatives told us that her condition is very serious. she cant speak anymore. i not sure if she can see us bcos when i look at her, she'll give me this gaze. i think she can hear abit. When my mum calls out to her when she's about to fall asleep, she'll open her eyes big big (in shock). Then back to sleepy mode. haha she really cute! i may sound happy tht she's dying? i not sure why when i look at her, even though she's very skinny, very weak, everybody knows she's dying, i'll still think she wont die. i only remember her cute acts.. is that why i won't feel sad?

The doc told us that she might not make it that night. Her hands are freaking cold and dehydrated. The machine cant even detect her blood pressure. the air con wasn't on, windows not opened. She had 2 blankets and a towel over her. But still she's cold. i didn't see her eat or drink but heard from the maid she consumed little. one more thing. what do u call the section between the hand and the elbow? the length tht matches ur sole? The whole area was bruised. the doc poke the needle wrong quite a few times .................................. @*&#$. it couldn't heal and still bleeding. About the machines, there's 3. one that i not sure of, the other for blood pressure and heart rate, and last one for the heart graph. The one i didn't know of is super annoying. It keeps giving off this "twoooooo' sound. Which makes us all very gan chiong cos in tv when a person's heart beat stop they'll have tht stupid sound -_- ...We stayed on till about 12+am and came back at noon the next day. At about 7+pm, quite a few of us were surrounding her bed. All of us were looking at the heart box. look at great grandmother. look at box. look at great grandmother. this time it's really critical. arghhhhh. ..... i told my uncle to go hold her hand, talk to her. i think to tell her to go in peace, no need worry.. We really worried for our uncle. He's brought up by her, and really loves and cares for her alot. much more than her own children to her. so at this moment, he has the most right to stand by her!! He held her hand, mumbled for quite some time. And when he's done, the graph became a straight line.

then that damn graph went all jumpy again!! We were all stunned. we asked for the doctor, she said the machine might have detected my uncle's heat or smth. Then some of my relatives go blame my uncle. WTH!!!!! #%^$@. this kind of thing still want blame here blame there. But later at about 8.02pm, my great grandmother passed away.

the rest of the days we made preparations for the wake. been folding the paper money, some praying. I had a few looks at my great grandmother in the coffin. Doesn't look like her at all. maybe bcos of the make-up? and she looked even smaller.. The day before yday, we went to burn all the paper money and a BIG paper mansion. Paper money got about ... i donno, but alot alot alot packets. Big pile. BIG BIG. And when we all pour out, it's really alot money! Then someone lit one paper money and throw into the big pile. Fire start to spread. In less than 5min? the whole pile gone. into ash. so fast!

then yday we did our final prayers- walked around the coffin a few times and throw flowers.. and one of the professionals? Closed the coffin. The coffin was carried into the white vehicle- the back is transparent so we could all see the coffin. We followed behind the van and with only socks and no shoes on, we walked out from the carpark to the main road. About 5-10min walk. Then we all board a big bus, and head for Mandai- to burn the coffin. 45min later, we reached this very big place. We were brought to this hall. It looks like a church with all the rows of wooden benches. In front is a table where we put our offerings and great grandma's photo. Then behind, the wall open O_O People pushed in the coffin. We all get off from our seats and went infront to say our final final prayers.. At the side, the guy told me to press a button. then the door slide open O_O like alot 'trap' doors. We came to this viewing hall. In front is this big glass window, u can see this big space below. u'll get to see the coffin burn. All was quiet.. then from a corner, the coffin came out. Not exactly pushed out. it's on a machine- all automatic. then at e other side the wall open like a door agn. coffin goes in. for burning. relatives at front row all sniffing.. When door close half way, a relative broke into tears. then all of them start to cry out loud. i can feel goosebumps. the atmosphere really .. i donno how say. then when i look at my uncle beside, a tear rolled down. *heart break*. i quickly hold his hand. heart shivering!! omg omg even cold blood me also tear.

We took off our dirty socks n wear our shoes. Went back to uncle's house. Use flower water wash face. Change white T-shirt to red. Some custom. and went home.

long week. still cant believe she died.

..... just now my mum informed me that my great grandma's son (my dad's uncle), passed away too. He was warded before my greatgrandma. Her funeral jus finish.. then he pass away.. could it be she went to fetch him? omg T_T ..............................

happier post next time!